OPEN MIKE NIGHTMARE

“Your phone is your omnipresent microphone to the world, a way to publish pictures, emails, texts, Twitters, and blog entries.”

Google wireless guru Andy Rubin, on how the Android operating system will enable bad cell-phone behavior in every conceivable medium, Official Google Blog, 19 September 2008

I INVENTED FRIGGING FAKE STEVE. HAVE YOU HEARD OF HIM?

“I really am much less interesting than Fake Steve as a writer.”

Steve Jobs impersonator-on-leave Dan Lyons, on his mild-mannered alter ego, Apple 2.0, 19 September 2008

THERE’S SOMETHING WRONG WITH THAT

““Jerry is a friend of the agency and Microsoft.”

Crispin Porter & Bogusky adman Rob Reilly, on the supposedly temporary disappearance of multimillion-dollar Microsoft pitchman Jerry Seinfeld, New York Times, 18 September 2008

COLOR ME CONFUSED

“Purple is the color of innovation and ingenuity. It’s fun and youthful, but also courageous and daring. It represents a spirit of individuality but also a sense of connectedness with others.”

Nick Chavez, a Yahoo brand manager, on the company’s “Start Wearing Purple” campaign, Yodel Anecdotal, 15 September 2008

BURN RATE ORDER

“We’ve had to deal with taking thousands of people out before, and taking them out globally.”

Hewlett-Packard CEO Mark Hurd, making his company’s mass layoffs sound a tad violent, Big Tech, 15 September 2008