PLOP, PLOP, FIZZ, FIZZ, OH, WHAT A BELIEF IT IS

“We’re pretty opposed to advertising. It really turns our stomachs.”

Tumblr founder David Karp, on his jingoistic opposition to connecting audiences with marketers, Los Angeles Times, 17 April 2010

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IT’S NOT OFFICIAL LIKE A REFEREE’S WHISTLE

“We will also admit our mistakes when they are made and the Blackberry client should never have been labeled ‘official.’ It has since been changed and you won’t see that language used with Twitter clients in the future.”

Twitter platform chief Ryan Sarver, on how his company will stop saying what it means in the future, Business Insider, 14 April 2010

A REAL-TIME NETWORK OF INFORMATION ABOUT WHO’S PAYING

“The idea behind Promoted Tweets is that we want to enhance the communications that companies are already having with customers on Twitter.”

Twitter COO and professional comedian Dick Costolo, keeping a straight face while pretending that Twitter’s new ads enhance anything but Twitter’s revenues, New York Times, 13 April 2010

FLASH IN THE PAN

“I am positive that there are a large number of Apple employees that strongly disagree with this latest move. Any real developer would not in good conscience be able to support this.”

Adobe evangelist and amateur psychic Lee Brimelow, ranting about Apple’s decision not to include Adobe’s cross-platform browser-crash-enabling technology in its mobile devices,