ATTENTION DEVELOPERS: PLEASE DOWNLOAD EXPECTATIONS PATCH

“In January, we had set bad expectations on the ability to ship this year, so we’ll ship it next year.”

Microsoft.NET general manager Michael Risse, on the company’s continuing delays in shipping anything resembling working code, News.com, 26 September 2000

SITE UNSEEN

“I don’t think the I.O.C. can be seen in any way limiting speech about the Olympics.”

International Olympic Committee new media director Franklin Servan-Schrieber, on the decidedly un-Olympic ban the IOC has placed on Internet coverage of the Games, The New York Times, 25 September 2000

NAME YOUR OWN DIGNITY’S PRICE

“I’m aware that there are people who weren’t satisfied with the service and I’m also aware Priceline is trying to deal with it. … I haven’t [used the service myself]. I think of myself as having to fly first class.”

Priceline pimp William Shatner, who knows better than to be handling the goods himself, on the company’s customer-service woes, 48 Hours, 21 September 2000

I DON’T WANT MY WEBPC

“If you never have products that don’t succeed, then you’re probably not experimenting enough.”

Michael Dell, on his company’s strategy to have PC design efforts serve as a full-employment act for Dell Factory Outlet staff, News.com, 21 September 2000

YOUR SHAREHOLDERS MIGHT HAVE LIKED TO ENTER SELL ORDERS A BIT FASTER, TOO

“Nobody wants to wait 90 seconds to do anything. The concept of ‘instant-on’ is probably the most underrated improvement that’s needed.”

Amazon.com CEO Jeff Bezos, whose enthusiasm for impulse buying might be misplaced, considering the same technology lets shareholders indulge in instant selling, CBS MarketWatch, 20 September 2000