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PLOP, PLOP, FIZZ, FIZZ, OH, WHAT A BELIEF IT IS

owenthomas — Sat, 17 Apr 2010 22:37:48 +0000

“We’re pretty opposed to advertising. It really turns our stomachs.”

Tumblr founder David Karp, on his jingoistic opposition to connecting audiences with marketers, Los Angeles Times, 17 April 2010

EVERY DAY, TWITTER IS MAKING HUMANS EASIER TO USE

owenthomas — Thu, 15 Apr 2010 06:50:52 +0000

“Twitter is too hard to use. We’ve known this for a long time, but it was growing too fast for us to address these issues.”

Twitter CEO Ev Williams, on how he’s intentionally inconvenienced his users because he’s so darn busy, VentureBeat, 14 April 2010

FLASH IN THE PAN

owenthomas — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 01:10:52 +0000

“I am positive that there are a large number of Apple employees that strongly disagree with this latest move. Any real developer would not in good conscience be able to support this.”

Adobe evangelist and amateur psychic Lee Brimelow, ranting about Apple’s decision not to include Adobe’s cross-platform browser-crash-enabling technology in its mobile devices,

IT’S NOT AN IPAD, IT’S A MATTRESS PAD

owenthomas — Thu, 01 Apr 2010 02:21:12 +0000

“I hope I can sleep with it Saturday night. It feels gorgeous.”

Kleiner Perkins venture capitalist John Doerr, taking Apple gadget lust to its logical yet absurd conclusion, VentureBeat, 31 March 2010

THE INTERNET IS FOR FLAMING

owenthomas — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 15:29:24 +0000

“They make the blog about themselves, filling it with posts announcing new hires, touting new products, and sharing pictures from the company picnic. That’s lovely, darling — I’m sure your mom cares.”

Fog Creek Software CEO and reformed blogger Joel Spolsky, making sure to remind everyone he’s gay in the process of decrying bloggers who share too much personal information, Inc., 1 March 2010

WRITE A NOVEL ALREADY, WHY DON’T YOU?

owenthomas — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 04:15:20 +0000

“After the events of the past several weeks, I have been in touch with many of you. It has become clear to me that there is far too little accurate information available in this time of unprecedented change. The issues we all face together are complex, and no news story or 140-character snippet can adequately address them. Therefore, I propose to write you occasionally, when I get a sense that there is a need for direct information.”

Macmillan CEO John Sargent, on taking to the blogosphere to press his case for more expensive e-books, Macmillan.com, 2 March 2010

THE UNBEARABLE LIGHTNESS OF BING

owenthomas — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 02:47:49 +0000

“The biggest opportunity is really to help people get done what they need to get done. I mean, it’s a marketing campaign, but it’s really true.”

Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer, on Bing’s destiny as a sort of Web-based Clippy, Seattlepi.com, 2 March 2010

AND THAT’S JUST THE PARTIES

owenthomas — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 02:32:19 +0000

“We’ll be the first to admit that, by conventional standards, Yelp can seem weird.”

Yelp CEO Jeremy Stoppelman, referring obliquely to the freakazoid culture of obsessive business reviewers on his site, Official Yelp Blog, 1 March 2010

THE DAY THE MUSIC SIGHED

owenthomas — Wed, 22 Aug 2007 05:28:23 +0000

“With RealNetworks and Verizon Wireless, we’re creating a unique and engaging experience that also reflects our own strategy of allowing fans to go narrow and deep into the musical genres they love.”

MTV Networks CEO Judy McGrath, introducing a new online music service while failing to understand that her company is all about being shallow, RealNetworks.com, 21 August 2007

LOVE IS IN THE ERROR

owenthomas — Sat, 18 Aug 2007 04:51:58 +0000

“The Skype system has not crashed or been victim of a cyber attack. We love our customers too much to let that happen.”

Skype employee Villu Arak, on how the eBay-owned Internet phone service hated its customers so much that it let a software glitch prevent them from using it, Skype Heartbeat blog, 16 August 2007