SOFTWARE FOR THE FRAGILE BUSINESS

“This was an operational error and not the result of any issue with Microsoft or third-party products, nor with the security of our networks.”

Microsoft spokesbot Adam Sohn, spinning desperately after a day when the software giant’s Web sites were largely unreachable due to a monstrously dumb network design, News.com, 24 January 2001

FOR CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTORS, THERE’S A “MY HEFLEY” PAGE

“It has taken me awhile because I prefer having a more personal relationship with my constituents.”

Representative Joel Hefley (R.-Colorado), the last member of Congress to go online, on his website’s very long time to market, Los Angeles Times, 22 January 2001

SOMETIMES YOU FEEL LIKE A NUT, SOMETIMES YOU WORK FOR ONE

“What we need are people who are going to be here working 16 hours a day, 7 days a week.”

Naveen Jain, on ousting his handpicked successor to reinstate himself as Infospace’s CEO — after selling off a large chunk of his rapidly plummeting shareholdings in the company, Yahoo/Reuters, 22 January 2001

CHEAP, SLOW, AND OUT OF CONTROL

“We’re making a statement about what the future of movies on the Internet is going to be.”

Jennifer Pesci, marketing director of SightSound.com, on the site’s deal to distribute Miramax film Guinevere online for $3.49, San Jose Mercury News, 19 January 2001

INPUT-OUTPUT ERROR

“The Microsoft case is a very important case. And the maintenance of competition in our culture is a very important aspect of what we need to make sure that we get the right output.”

U.S. attorney general nominee John Ashcroft, doing his best Bill Gates impression while dodging questions about the Microsoft antitrust case, Wired News, 18 January 2001